


Incisivi Allungati

by NZFandomPrincess96



Category: Bohemian Rhapsody (Movie 2018), Queen (Band)
Genre: Blood, Bohemian Rhapsody, Clare Spelt with an I, Orthodontia, Roger is a dentist, Swearing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-23
Updated: 2019-04-23
Packaged: 2020-01-25 16:20:20
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,515
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18578113
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NZFandomPrincess96/pseuds/NZFandomPrincess96
Summary: Title means "Elongated Incisors." During the summer holidays, Kash's teeth become fangs, so it's Dr. Roger Taylor to the rescue





	Incisivi Allungati

Elongated Incisors  
  
Author's Note: This very long, single-chapter story came to mind when I saw the "Birthday Scene" in "Bohemian Rhapsody." In said scene, Roger sits beside Kashmira, and asks her "what are you doing later?" Now, as most fans of Queen would know, Roger Taylor was definitely a ladies man. So, it takes little imagination to work out what Roger was hoping to happen. Anyway, I thought a little story between the two of them would be fun. Hope you enjoy it.  
New Zealand Fandom Princess Ninety-Six  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
Could anything be worse than having Incisivi Allungati? Probably, yes, but the very few unfortunate people who have such a problem, would probably say no, there wasn't.  
Incisivi Allungati was a very ancient (and very rare) orthodontia problem, affecting one in thirty thousand people. It usually affected the adult incisor teeth, causing them to become elongated, and because it was so rare, and at the time, people believed in supernatural beings, so the unfortunate victims were accused of being vampires or something similar, and then burnt to death at the stake.  
  
Kashmira Bulsara shivered as she read the Wikipedia page on such a rare illness. Some people can be so arrogant, or afraid, she thought as she sucked on her own top teeth. Even at the age of eighteen, she still had four baby teeth left. All four baby incisors were still intact, which is unusual, but not unheard of. Those particular teeth had shallow roots, so she'd be waiting a little while longer before they came out naturally on their own. Even Monsieur Poursuivre, her dentist, had told her that they would come out on their own.  
Monsieur Poursuivre. Just the mention of that name caused even the strongest of people to shudder. He was not a nice man, and had instilled Ordontophobia into children and adults alike. He was a very scary dentist, and nobody liked him.  
There was another dental surgery in Suffolk, where Kash and her family lived. Her brother, Freddie, went to that other dentistry surgery instead of Monsieur Poursuivre. This was a good, because the French dentist would probably have fixed his teeth without Freddie's permission. For, you see, Freddie had an impressive overbite, born with four additional incisors. Of course, his mouth had to accommodate for four additional teeth, which made his jaw stick out more, but also gave him an impressive range when singing, which was good, because he was part of a band called Queen, and was their lead singer.  
************************************  
Queen was a really neat rock and roll band, and Kash adored their music. Their parents hadn't been overly pleased when Freddie had suddenly announced one day out of the blue that he'd legally changed his name to Freddie Mercury. Kash found it amusing, her mother had been a little unhappy, but her father wasn't amused at all.  
As well as Freddie, they had a guitarist called Brian May, whose curly black hair made him look like a poodle, a bassist called John Deacon, who was born on the 19th of August in nineteen fifty one, and a very good-looking drummer called Ben Hardy. (Don't worry. Roger is still in this story.)  
As she finished writing up her report for "Rare Medical Problems in Ancient Times That Were Fatal," having been given that topic, Kash sighed happily. It was her last assignment before the Summer Holidays, and she'd been given tickets to see her awesome big brother singing his heart out to thousands of people.  
Beaming, she handed in her finished and polished essay to her teacher, showing her teeth. Her teacher grinned back, and told everyone to have a splendid holiday.  
"YAY! It's summer time!" They all cheered and fled the school as fast as was humanly possible.  
********************************  
It was about three weeks into the holidays when Claire Taylor, one of Kash's girlfriends from school (not in the gay sense of the word), invited her over for her birthday party. Kash was only too happy to say yes. Not only did she like Claire, but she also had a very strong romantic crush on her friend's brother, Roger. He was the only guy she'd ever met, apart from her brother's drummer, that looked absolutely beautiful when dressed as a school girl. That had happened in a game of Truth or Dare, and both boys had been dared to dress up as girls. The result of this was that Roger had found this extremely funny, and had asked Freddie to film a music video in drag, which they did for their song I Want To Break Free. Roger had been offered a cameo role, but he'd declined, saying something about canals which Kash didn't understand. She thought he was talking about the canals they had in Italy, where people went up and down on Gondolas, but it turned out not to be the case at all. (Fans of Queen would know what kind of canals he was really referring to.)  
Anyway, the day of the party came, and with it came a horrible surprise. When Kash woke up that morning, having spent the night on her right, and her mouth partially open, she was stunned to see her pillow, which was normally white, had now gone a deep blood red. Startled, she ran her hand across it, and it was wet.  
She sat up, and wondered what on earth could have happened. Thinking something like a feminine problem had taken place, she looked fearfully down at her legs. They, however, were completely fine. Relieved, she hurried into the bathroom and opened her mouth. She nearly screamed when she saw her reflection. Inside her mouth, where her baby incisors had finally decided to come out one week into the holidays, were now four sharp fangs.  
"Oh no. I've got Incisivi Allungati ," she whimpered as one of her top fangs stabbed her tongue. She winced in pain as one of her bottom fangs caught on the roof of her mouth.  
"What the heck am I supposed to do?" She asked herself.  
Normally, in this situation, most people would simply go to the dentist, but Kash had recently heard that her dentist had gone back to France, and she had yet to enroll at another Dental Practice.  
Sighing, and wincing in pain, she opted for sticking pieces of cork over her elongated teeth. It made her look very odd, but at least the cork was strong, so it didn't break.  
**************************************  
Later, having managed to get through the day, the party, and the night, Kashmira awoke early that following morning. Her mouth was sore from all the unconscious biting she'd done during the night, and the metallic taste of blood lingered, which made her feel sick.  
She leaned over and flicked on the lamp beside the guest bed she'd been sleeping in, before turning her attention back to the pillow. It was worse than the day before. Half of the pillow was stained, and so were the sheets. Even her pajama top had been splattered in red.  
"Yuck," she muttered in disgust, and managed to swallow back the nauseous feeling long enough to reach the kitchen sink, before retching violently. She looked up, and caught sight of her reflection in the window. If vampires had reflections, then what she saw wasn't too far off. Her normally exotic-looking face was pale, she was wearing black pajamas, and she had blood running down her chin.  
She weakly slumped against the sink, gasping for breath, and occasionally retched, hoping someone would help her.  
Luck was on her side soon enough, for after vomiting for the eighth time, she glanced out of the corner of her eye. A pair of legs, covered in a pair of black pants, stood in her vision, and she looked up to see a very bewildered and concerned-looking Roger.  
"Good morning," she said, wiping the blood from her chin.  
"Hardly. What the fuck happened to your mouth?" He asked.  
"Nothing," she said.  
"The hell there's nothing wrong. You want to try again?" He asked, lifting an eyebrow.  
"Just leave me alone," she said. "I've just been biting my tongue, is all."  
Roger's cerulean irises narrowed. "Yeah, but no ordinary bite is hard enough to make a female look like Dracula's wife. Something is seriously wrong with you, Kash."  
"I don't want to die," she said, which threw him off guard.  
"Well, you might, if you keep bringing up blood like that," he said, and put a hand on her jaw.  "Open up," he said firmly.  
Speaking out of the corner of her mouth, she asked, "Are you a dentist, or something? 'Cause if not," she began, but he cut her off.  
"Yes, I am," he clarified.  
"Oh. Promise you won't burn me at the stake?" She begged, and his eyes went wide.  
"Oh, shit. Open your mouth, now. This is really serious-" he began, but was cut off by a high-pitched scream.  
"Holy Fuck! Somebody, please come and help me!" Came a terrified voice which both Kashmira and Roger recognised as Claire's.  
From downstairs, Roger could hear their parents scolding his sister for swearing, before they started screaming and swearing as well.  
Kash and Roger ran downstairs, Kash retching more blood along the way, giving Roger a chance to see her elongated teeth.  
"You should have said something," he scolded her lightly, as they reached the guest room.  
"I was too scared," she muttered, but the other three heard her anyway.  
"Oh, Kash. I'm bloody relieved to see that you're actually alive," Claire breathed.  
"Claire Antoinette Taylor, if I hear you swear again, I will take your phone away," her father snapped.  
"What the heck happened to you?" Claire asked.  
"Incisivi Allungati," she said.  
"Permission to swear one more time, father?" Claire asked. His eyes narrowed, and he shook his head. But she ignored him, anyway.  
"Well, fuck me. That's fucking serious. I had that when I was seven years old, and it's bloody rare for it to happen to an adult."  
Roger lifted an eyebrow. "Yes, that's what inspired me to become a dentist. When she came out of surgery, I knew that I wanted to help people with problems like that."  
"Please help me, Roger," Kash cried, and he smiled. "Of course," he said, putting an arm around her shoulders and was about to lead her away, when he stopped and turned to Claire.  
"Don't ever swear like that again. It's not very ladylike." And with that, he drove Kash to his surgery.  
Behind him, Claire scoffed. "He tells me off for swearing, yet he does it," she told her parents.  
They raised their eyebrows, and she rolled her cerulean eyes. "I know, I know. Two wrongs don't make a right. Do you think Kash will be okay?"  
"With Roger's help? There's no doubt about that. Help me change these sheets, will you?" Her mother asked.  
***************************************  
At first, despite an aching jaw, Kash was sure she'd be fine. Roger had quickly introduced her to the receptionist, a pretty French girl called Dominique, and then pulled her along to his office.  
"How exactly are you going to fix this one, Rog?" Kash asked, then added, "Or should I call you Dr. Taylor?"  
Roger laughed. "I'm fine with either. I'm the most informal orthodontist you'd ever meet. To answer your question, I'm going to pull those fangs out. Don't worry, though. Underneath are four perfectly normal teeth."  
"Thanks," she said, and Roger nodded.  
"You're welcome," he smiled, and stuck a needle into her mouth. Pretty soon, Kash felt a wave of tiredness wash over her and she fell asleep.  
_When she opened her eyes again, she couldn't fathom where on earth she could be. Instead of a modern dental surgery, she was sitting in a field of buttercups on a beautiful morning. Birds were chirping gaily, and not far off was a bubbling brook._  
_"What on earth just happened?" She asked herself, getting to her feet, and ran her tongue over her teeth. Her incisors still felt sharp, and she spat out a mouthful of blood._  
_"Guess he's not done yet," she mused and began to walk around. She hadn't been walking far or for very long when she heard a commotion from a little way ahead of her._  
_Intrigued, she followed the sounds of shouting and jeering until she reached the outskirts of what looked like an old-fashioned country town in America. You know the ones I mean. They have very few shops, and one pub. Usually, there would be tumbleweeds blowing about as well._  
_Anyway, Kash soon came across a crowd of around thirty or so, and a couple of priests who were dragging two screaming children  of around ten years old, through the crowd._  
_"Burn the Devil's Children!" The audience screamed. Kash looked, but couldn't see anything wrong at first with them._  
_"We aren't Devil's Children," cried one. "Please let us go," screamed the other, and Kash saw their teeth. They too, had Incisivi Allungati._  
_"You have his teeth," jeered one woman. With her strong southern accent, Kash knew she was in America._  
_"Burn them!" The audience yelled._  
_Kash hurriedly climbed up on a small, raised mound, cupped her hands around her mouth, and screamed, "LEAVE THEM ALONE!"_  
_There was a sudden hush over the audience, and they began to look around._  
_"Who said that?" Demanded one man who resembled Owen Wilson's character from Night At The Museum._  
_"Up there!" Another yelled, pointing upwards._  
_"She's in league with the Devil. Burn her, too!" The crowd yelled._  
_"Bugger," Kash muttered, as the crowd surged towards her. She took to her feet, and started to run, but to no avail. Someone soon caught her, and before she knew it, she was tied to a wooden stake._  
_"Send them to Hell!" One woman called, and the audience cheered when the three stakes were set alight._  
_Kash screamed as the flames reached her, and her back arched. Smoke was choking her, and she couldn't breathe properly. She knew she was going to die._  
_**"Goodbye, everybody, I've got to go,** " she sang softly under her breath, and a soft chuckle reached her ears._  
_"No need to be quite so dramatic, dear," a familiar voice said, and she blinked._  
Standing in front of her was her brother, Freddie. She stared at him in astonishment.  
"What are you doing here, Freddie?"  
"Roger called me, and told me to come and see you. Are you alright?"  
"Fine, but I didn't know people dreamed under anesthesia," she mumbled. "That was a horrid nightmare."  
"It's rare, but it can happen," said Roger, coming in with a white bowl and a spoon.  
"What's that?" She asked, pointing.  
"Ice cream. Your jaw must be bothering you by now."  
**************************************  
A week had gone by since her small surgery, and she was vastly relieved that her teeth were back to normal.  
"You should get yours fixed, Farrohk," his mother smiled.  
"I'd advise against it. **More space in his mouth means more range**." Kash grinned.  
  
**AN: Well, not really a Roger/Kash story, but I wanted to do something. Hope you like it.**


End file.
